Getting Over Their Loss
by fah13
Summary: Dawsey gap-fillers from season 4x04
1. Chapter 1

_Dawsey gap-filler for episode 4x04 (aftermath)_

* * *

Leaning against the doorframe of their bedroom, a cup of coffee in his hands, Matt watched the rise and fall of his fiancee's chest, the subject currently deep in her sleep. He hate to wake her up from her slumber but he knew he would have to deal with a grumpy Gabby later if he didn't. Women huh. Never could anyone fully understand them.

"Hey babe. I'm leaving for work now," he said slightly shaking her shoulders.

"Hmmm ok babe. Be safe," she replied groggily.

Matt shook his head, a small smile playing on his lips. Placing a goodbye kiss on her forehead, he grabbed his bag and made his way out of the apartment.

* * *

"Hey, welcome back Lieutenant. How's our girl doing?" Hermann turned to greet his Lieutenant as they made their way through the driveway to the firehouse.

"She's getting better. Doc gave her 2 weeks of medical leave. She'll be back for duty once she clears her physical after," Matt replied to Gabby's surrogate father.

"Aah, she's strong. She'll rally. Just be there for her."

Matt gave Hermann an appreciative smile as they made their way through the double doors and into the locker room where he found the rest of his crew members getting ready for shift. All of them had visited Gabby in the hospital and after she was released, dropped by their apartment on a number of occasion to give their support. They will hang around for an hour or two and Matt could see that each time after any of them came by, Gabby will be in a much more cheerful mood. They kept her from thinking too much about happened and he feels very appreciative towards them.

There was a series of welcome back greetings the moment his crew saw him as he stepped into the locker room. "Thanks guys. It feels good to be back. Gabby told me to say hi to all of you and that she will be back in no time to keep Otis in line."

There was a chorus of relief laughter as everyone silently breathes a silent thank you to the Lord above for not taking their sister away from them too soon. "Ah, she's ready to come back today but decided to play hookey for a few more shifts instead," Otis replied with a smile on his face. Gabby is like a sister to him. He miss ribbing with her and generally hanging out with one of the coolest girl he had gotten the chance to know. He decided he shall start the day by forwarding to her a meme he just received from one of his CFD buddies that is sure to make her belly laugh.

* * *

"Lieutenant Casey, Chief wants to see you," Connie informed him as he sat in his office looking through the reports of the last few shifts he missed as he had taken some furlow to take care of Gabby. To be honest, he was not really concentrating on the reports. His thoughts were on Gabby, worried about how she is holding up especially since this is the first time she is on her own since the surgery. He had notice the distant look she had on her face when she thought no one was around and everytime he sees it, all he wants to do is gather her into his arms and tell her everything is going to be fine. That what happened was not her fault. But he knows Gabby. She just needs time on her own to deal with what happened and move on.

Turning his head, he looked up at Connie standing at the doorway of his office, "Thanks Connie. I'll be right out."

* * *

"Hey Chief, you wanted to see me?"

Boden eyed his lieutenant as he walked walked into his office and stood before his desk. He looked better than he did when he was at the hospital but Boden wanted to make sure that his head is at the right place.

"I just wanted to check up on you. How're you doing?" he asked.

"I'm fine. Really. Time heals all wounds right? I'm just glad Gabby made it through."

Just like Casey to deal with things by not dealing with them, Boden thought. He knows Casey to bury his thoughts and feelings deep within him but he wants to make sure that Casey knows he has the support of his firehouse family as two of their members get through this tragedy. "Anytime, anytime you feel like talking, my door is always open."

"Thanks Chief," Casey replied with a small smile, appreciating his Chief's concerns. It's just like him to take care of his people and be there for them no matter what happens. Casey turned to leave intending this time with more determination to finish reading the reports on his desk before breakfast.

Boden stared at his lieutenant's retreating back and no matter how much Casey tries to convince him that he is doing well on all fronts, he noticed the slumped of his shoulders. He knew that posture. It's a sign that Casey is carrying too much weight on his shoulders. He knows that all Casey wants to do is to protect the woman he loves at all cost but Boden is going to make sure that Casey knows he can rely on others in the house too to share the weight. He sighed as Connie popped her head into his office informing him that Chief Riddle was on his way to House 51.

* * *

"Chows up!" exclaimed Borelli.

Matt was leaning against the kitchen counter, his second cup of coffee in his hand, his eyes roaming around the common room. The rowdy sound of his men fooling around and the sounds from the tv were sounds that he is familiar with but it was missing something; the sweet and addictive laughter of his girl. His heart tugged a little as he thought of her. Only a few hours had passed since he left her in her slumber and he missed her already. Taking his phone out from his jacket pocket, he started to make his way back to his office.

"You eating with us, Lieutenant?" he heard Otis called out to him.

"I'll be back," he replied, waving his phone in his hand not turning around.

He heard the laughter and snickering from his men as he turned the corner. They can tease him all they want. He got his girl back, that is all that matters.

* * *

He felt his phone vibrating in his hand the moment he stepped into his office. Looking at the caller ID, a huge smile formed across his face.

"Hey babe."

"Hey. I miss you. Sorry I couldn't wake up this morning to see you off. The painkillers knocked me right out."

"Don't worry about it. I miss you too by the way. Was just about to give you a call and see how you're doing."

"I'm fine Matt. I'm not about to break apart, ok."

"I know. I know. It's just hard to be apart from you that's all."

"It's only been a few hours, baby. I'll see you soon."

"You have a doctor's appointment later right? I can take a few hours off to go with you and Hermann can cover for me."

"I'll be alright on my own. Don't worry about me ok."

"It's my job to worry about you."

Truck 81, Squad 3, Ambo 61, Battalion 25. Structure fire.

"Hey babe, I got to go. I'll call you later alright. Love you."

"Love you too. Stay safe."

* * *

"Hey guys, not a word to Dawson about the call just now alright" Matt turned around from his seat to look at his men seated in the back as they made their way back to quarters from their last call.

"I don't think you can hide that one from her, Casey," Hermann replied pointing a finger to the gash on Casey's forehead that had been plastered up pretty nicely by Brett when they were on scene.

"She doesn't need to know the details."

Hermann shook his head. He understood Matt's situation. He had been there himself. Trying to compensate for the life of one of your own that you can't save by saving others that you can. But that guy is going to extremes to save all lives and at the same time putting himself in great danger. His heart went out to his lieutenant. He better be keeping an eye on him, he thought.

* * *

"Hey Casey, it's about 18 hours more till shift ends. You sure you can go that long without Dawson?" Otis teased as he caught his lieutenant looking at his phone for the thousandth time that day since shift started and a smile would always be playing on his lips as he read through his messages.

"Shut it, Otis. I don't see any girl's name popping on your phone," Cruz jumped into Casey's defence before Casey can lodged one on his own.

"Don't worry guys. In fact, she might be coming by later today," Casey intervened before a war breaks out between the two knuckleheads. Cruz might have joined the Squad team, but more often than not, he can still be found hanging around the Truck guys during down time. It doesn't matter though. Truck or Squad, they are family.

"That's great! Maybe Borelli here can fix us a nice lunch since a special guest is coming," Mouch cannot help but use the opportunity to have freshly cooked food for lunch rather than finishing the french toast that had since turned cold before the call earlier.

Matt shook his head at his men as they began to talk back and forth about lunch and french toast. He is glad Gabby had taken up his invitation to come over to the house after her doctor's appointment. He can breathe much easier knowing he can keep an eye on her while she's here.

* * *

"Catching up on paperwork?" Matt's head immediately popped up from the reports on his desk the moment he heard the familiar sweet voice rang through his office.

"Hey, you made it." Matt can't stop the huge smile spreading over his face as he turned to see his girl standing at his office's doorway. Her beautiful face and sweet voice lifting his spirits.

"Yeah, I caught up with the guys, thanking them for all their support. They were all so sweet." Gabby said as she leaned against Matt's desk.

Casey smiled at the thought of his men being sweet to his lady, their sister if they could call her that.

"Matt, what happened?"

Casey saw the the worry etched in her face as her eyes landed on the band aid on his eyebrow and her hand already went up to inspect the injury.

Raising his hand unconsciously to the band aid, Matt replied with a shrug, "It's nothing. Just a small cut from the last call."

"How are you feeling?" he quickly continued trying to change the subject.

"I'm fine. The stitich wound is healing pretty nicely," Gabby replied offhandedly, narrowing her gaze at the abrupt change of subject. She didn't buy what Matt had just told her but thought that it was best to let it slip it for now. She will ask Otis about it later.

"Yeah, so you don't need me to play nurse anymore then?" Casey said as he stood up and pulled the door close behind her. Trapped between himself and the door, Gabby felt his breath on her face as he bent down to slowly capture her lips with his own. Their kiss quickly began to get hot and steamy but before it could go on any further, he stopped with ragged breath and rested his forehead against hers.

"I'm sorry. Got a little out of hand."

Gabby smiled up at him, cupping his face with both hands. Stroking his clean shaven jaw lovingly, she said, "You'll be the first to know when i get the all clear."

"I better be, darling," he replied teasingly as he gave a final peck to her forehead before taking her hand and leading her to his cot.

"You can rest here, keep me company."

"Don't let me get used to all this pampering."

"Oh, rest assured this is never going to end. I'm never letting anything happened to you."

Gabby smiled faintly. She knows that she's a strong and independent woman and Matt said so that was what he admired most about her. Perhaps this is only a temporary side effect of what happened and she understood Matt's instinctive nature to be more protective. But she definitely needs to have a talk with him if he gets too overbearing but right now she loves the attention he's been giving her and she intends to embrace it. Reaching for a book that was sitting by the bedside table, she settled herself on the cot.

"First Time Parenting." That was the title of the book that was by his bedside table. A sudden wave of realisation hit her. Matt had been excited to bring up a child together with her and she felt really guilty for destroying his dream. Her heart clenched as she stared at the back of his head seated at his desk finishing up his paperwork. She loves him so much and all she wanted is to make him happy but she has destroyed whatever happiness she could have provided for him. She felt fresh tears threatening to fall as she quickly laid the book back down where she found it. She had not cried since that day she woke up from her second surgery and was informed of her miscarriage. Matt had not left her side since then and she had taken strength from just being near him, blocking her emotions from re-surfacing. She was determined to move on and accept what fate had brought upon them. But she realised now that she had been selfish. She should have known that she was pregnant sooner. The symptoms were all there. She could have prevented losing her baby - Matt's baby - by not entering into that burning building at the last call they had before she found out she was pregnant. She turned to her side, facing the wall, as tears that she fought hard to control slowly fell, dampening the pillows beneath her head.

Hearing the sniffles from the cot behind him, Matt turned around to find Gabby lying on her side, eyes tightly, trying her best to control her cries but he could see the hurt she was feeling from the contort of her face and the deep frown in her eyebrows. Worried, he rushed to her side. "Baby, what's wrong? Are you hurt?" Laying a hand on a small part of her back, he rubbed her back in circular motion thinking that maybe she was having some cramps and what he was doing will soothe her. His vision then spotted the book on the bedside table and instantly he knew what happened. He felt a tight squeeze in his chest as all the painful thoughts of what happened recently came barrelling into him. He must be strong, he thought. He needs to be there for Gabby. Their baby might have brought them back together sooner, but there was no doubt in his mind and in his heart that it was only a matter of time before they would have found their way back to each other's arms. Shaking off his boots, he laid down beside her on his side, placing his hand on her waist and pulled her close against him. "It's ok. It's going to be alright. You and I. We are all that matters. Shhh..."

It was then he realised that they both had not completely recover from their loss but he promise himself that they'll get there in due time and they will do so, together.


	2. Chapter 2

Dawsey gap-filler for episode 4x05

* * *

"Gabby?"

"In here!"

Matt walked over to the kitchen as he entered their home after a long shift where he found Gabby at the stove preparing breakfast.

"Hey, how was shift?"

"It started slow but later we got called to a fire at this house party filled with high school kids. 2 died on scene. Few more taken to Chicago Med. Doesn't look too good."

Hearing what just happened, Gabby turned off the stove and turned around to give Matt a quick hug. She knows how hard some calls were and that, was one of them. Calls which involved children and young adults always hit them the worst. She cannot imagine what it was like for parents who have lost their child. Having watched your child grew up only to lose him before they can even begin to realise their dreams is a wretched feeling that she dared not think about. Her own pain after the miscarriage felt like a dull throb as compared to what they must be feeling.

Matt returned her hug with a tight squeeze, grateful for the act of comfort Gabby had provided for him. He placed a kiss on top of her head before she lifted her face up to give him a peck on the lips.

Looking deep into her big brown eyes, he made an impulsive decision, "Date night. Tonight. You and me."

"Okay..," Gabby replied, a huge smile starting to spread across her face. She felt her heart beat a little faster and a rush of excitement filling her bloodstream. It had been awhile since they went out on a proper date. Ever since they got back together, their busy routine had constrained their time together to catch up on work and family commitments, household chores and their part time work They barely had time for each other and date night sounds about perfect.

* * *

"Have fun, guys!" Kelly waved them off from the kitchen bar, a twinkle in his eyes, as the couple made their way towards the front door. He was happy to see his two best friends finally getting their act together and getting through their first turbulence back as a couple with more grace and commitment than their last. Shay would be happy, he thought.

"We'll see you at Molly's later," Matt replied before closing the door behind him. He was worried about Severide's well-being after his demotion but he has every faith that the pupils will be restored to his well-deserved owner not a moment too soon. He's just hoping that the moment comes sooner rather than later. It would be great to be working with Severide together as equals. Although he has no pressing issues working in the capacity of a leader with Patterson on calls, they are not in tune with one other well enough to understand the underlying signals that are kept well hidden in the face of a deadly, dangerous or sensitive situation in order not to raise panic among their men.

* * *

"So, where are we heading?"

"I've made reservations at our Italian restaurant." Matt looked over at Gabby as he started the engine of his truck, trying to gauge her reaction to his choice of restaurant. He was a little relieved when he saw her eyes lighted up in surprise.

"Did I miss any of our special dates, Matt?" she said hesitantly trying to recall the significance of the date. The restaurant had always been reserved for special occasions: birthdays, anniversaries, career and personal milestones. It had been both of their personal favourite restaurant and it also happened to be the restaurant that they had their first dinner at together. Years ago, Matt had made reservations for his date with Hallie at the restaurant but she had to blow the date after being called back to the hospital. Not wanting to put the reservation to waste, Matt had invited Gabby, who had just joined 51, to dinner with him. They had hit it off almost as soon as they were introduced but as Matt was together with Hallie, they had kept their relationship strictly as friends. During the dinner, they both realised the attraction between them and how in sync they are with each other but they both refused to acknowledge it. Matt, being the upstanding guy he is, felt that he should do the right thing by Hallie whom he had been dating for a few years. Furthermore, not soon afterwards, Gabby began dating some guy and the timing since then was never right for them. It would be a lie if Matt said that a part of him never always wondered where they would be right now if he had seized that moment at the restaurant that night and explored the connection he always seem to have felt when he was with her rather than always doing the right thing. Although he loved Hallie, he knew that deep down, Gabby was the first woman who truly captured his heart and since their first encounter, she had taken permanent residence in a corner, taking a backseat whenever Hallie was in the picture. One thing he would always be grateful for was that he kept the memory of their first dinner at the restaurant sacred and had never since that night brought anyone with him to the restaurant. He dared not tarnish the one place that held the memory to what was admittedly one of the happiest night in his adult life.

Taking hold of her left hand in his right, he gave it a gentle squeeze and stared into her eyes, "One of the reasons I am in love with you is because you are one of the strongest woman I've ever known. We have been celebrating all our milestones at this restaurant and it has since become to me a symbol of strength of both ourselves and our relationship. I've never brought anyone else to the restaurant since we had our first dinner there when you first joined 51. Tonight, we are going to celebrate another display of strength. One that you had shown the past few weeks. What you went through, how you dealt with it, is something that is worth admiring and I want to celebrate that."

Gabby was surprised and truly touched by the heartfelt words spoken by Matt. He is not a romantic but more of an action speaks louder than words kind of guy. He is always thoughtful and considerate but never romantic. He is a practical person and shows his love in his own subtle way. Gabby does not need the romantic gestures of flowers and poems to know he loves her because she felt the sincerity and love from him whenever he does something for her but at that moment, she never heard something more romantic and beautiful. She never felt more loved and cherished by him. Tears started to prick behind her eyes and unconsciously rolled down her cheeks. She grabbed his face down towards her and kissed him deeply, pouring all the love she felt for him in that one kiss.

"You were not spared baby. Its our baby. You were there all the time, holding my hand and keeping me close. I drew strength from that."

"I love you," she whispered.

"I love you too."

Matt was still a little unsure if he did the right thing by planning this surprise. The tears didn't settle his worries much either. But if she said she loved him and if that kiss meant anything, it meant he did the right thing, right? He ran his thumb pad over her cheeks wiping away her tears. He must still have a confused look on his face as what Gabby said next finally settled his worries and he let out a nervous chuckle.

"Don't worry Matt. I'm really happy. I've been crying alot lately. Both good and bad. It must have been the hormones. Takes a while for it to be completely flushed out from my system," she said with a small laugh, wiping away her remaining tears with the back of her hands.

* * *

Dinner was eaten over great conversations and laughter. By the time dessert was served, they air between them felt lighter, nice, comfortable and it felt normal. They could feel themselves being drawn back into the bubble they were once in when they first got together.

"Hey, listen," Matt started as he grabbed Gabby's hand from across the table and held them firmly in his, subconsciously rubbing her knuckles with her thumb.

"I know sometimes you blame yourself for losing our baby. I want you to know that it is not on you. I don't blame you. It was just not meant to be. What happened was a great loss but one thing I know for sure, the baby brought us closer together than ever before. Honestly, I can't wait to start a family with you. But right now, I would like to have you all to myself for a little longer."

Gabby felt her a squeezed in her chest and tears started to well up in her eyes. Squeezing Matt's hands tightly in hers, she nodded enthusiastically trying to keep her tears at bay. Her heart had never felt more full at Matt's words.

* * *

Wrapping his hands around her shoulders and her hands around his waist, they walked together through the door into Molly's after dinner.

"Surprise!"

Gabby's eyes widen looking around at the faces of all her friends from House 51, their hands high up in the air.

"We're celebrating you coming back to the firehouse next shift. Next round 30% discount!" Hermann shouted across to Gabby from begind the bar amidst the cheers from the patrons in the bar.

Looking around at all the familiar faces in the bar, Gabby cannot begin to start counting how blessed she is. Taking a deep breath, she tightened her grip around Matt's waist and looked at her second family with pure appreciation, "Wow... You guys are just about the best thing that can ever happened to me. Aside from Matt of course. Matt and I would like to thank all of you from the bottom of our hearts for all the support and encouragement you gave us over the last few weeks. We are really grateful and feel really blessed to call you our family. Probably not so soon, but we do hope a mini Casey will be running round the firehouse one day."

There were claps and slaps on the back when Gabby finished her short speech. Gabby turned around to look at Matt who gave her a quick kiss on her lips.

"One day," he repeated.

The next few hours was filled with laughter and chatters as the firefighters and paramedics of House 51 and other familiar patrons from District 21 filled into Molly's. But Matt never left Gabby's side. They were glued to the hip and it didn't escape anyone's eyes.

"You're back to manning the bar next week kid. Enjoy these last few nights with our lieutenant," Hermann said with a wink to Gabby as he set their beers down on the table.

Gabby smirked at him with a glare. She felt a nudge on her side and turned to see Matt looking at her with a playful smile on his lips.

"He's right you know. I would love to spend longer nights with you."

She returned his flirtatious smile with one of her own. She sneaked a hand up to his neck and her thumb began caressing the back of his neck.

In a low husky voice, she leaned to whisper in his ear, being certain she was close enough to brush her chest against his arms. "Like I promised, you're the first to know. I'm cleared for active duty. And i mean for all... activities."

The moment she said it, Matt could feel his jeans starting to get a little tight. Matt stared lustily into her eyes. She had no idea what she was doing to him. Without breaking eye contact with her, he downed the remaining of his beer, grabbed her hand and slid out of the booth dragging Gabby behind him.

"Thanks guys for tonight! But doc said Gabby needs as much rest as possible before she returns for active duty. So, we'll see you next shift."

There was a series of cheers and see yous hollered as the couple said their goodbyes and quickly made their way out of the door but before the door closed behind them, Matt shared an understanding look with Severide.

Taking note of the time, Severide made sure to be home hours later to give the couple some privacy in their shared apartment.

* * *

"Resting requires a bed and personally I prefer not to be clothed when I'm in it," Gabby smiled flirtatiously up at him as they walked hand in hand towards Matt's truck.

"I can give you a back massage. Make sure all that knots are loosen up so you'll be ready for what comes next," Matt responded in a low whisper into her ear.

His breath on her ear was sending tingling sensations through her body. She slipped her hand which was around his waist, under his shirt and started caressing his naked back.

Feeling the heat intensifying between them and thinking no one was around, he gently pushed Gabby against the passenger door of his truck and in an instant, the two were making out like teenagers, their silhouette being illuminated by the street lamp above them.

Unbeknown to the both of them, in a dark corner sat a lady on a bench who was watching the show evolved before her with more interest than she should have.

* * *

It was her first shift back and to be honest, she was quite nervous but excited at the same time. She loves her job and it makes it even more pleasurable when you are working with the person that you love. But she was still quite unsure whether their relationship will be able to weather through another round of superior-subordinate relationship at work. Deep in her own thoughts, she continued packing her bag for work.

"Hey, you're up early. Excited for your first shift back?"

The husky voice of Matt who was now wide awake in bed startled her thoughts.

"A little, yea. I'm ready, lieutenant," she replied as she gave him a small smile.

Matt frowned as he got out of bed and stood in front of her, his hands around her waist holding her close.

"I'm your lieutenant at work but at home, I am all yours. I'm not about to blow it again this time. You mean too much to me."

Gabby looked into his eyes, trusting his words. She gave him a small nod in understanding.

Matt gave her a quick peck on the lips before letting her go and heading to the bathroom to get ready for work.

* * *

Matt shut the engine of his truck as they reached the firehouse but before Gabby open the passenger door, he grabbed her forearm to stop her from leaving. "I love you. Take care of yourself." Leaving a quick kiss on her forehead, he grabbed both their bags and stepped out from the truck, leaving a speechless Gabby behind.

"You coming, babe?"

"Yeah, Yeah." She scrambled out, still a little shock at the display of vulnerability from Matt. He never use to showcase his emotions and vulnerability so openly before. This change in him, trying to communicate better with her is a good change, she thought.

* * *

Matt had kept her updated on all that had been going on in the firehouse when she was on medical leave. Hence, she could understand all the inside jokes the guys were cracking and the current debate Mouch and Otis had going on between them. She felt really good to be back.

Later that morning, they were called to a burning house where the families of a couple were preparing themselves for their wedding. Matt, Hermann and Borelli had went in to search for the bride, the bridesmaids and the pastor who were trapped on the second floor and the groom who had went back into the burning house to save his bride.

Gabby could listen on the radio Matt's voice asking for help with the metal grills that were fixed outside the windows of the second floor. She looked up to see Severide and Cruz climbing up the ladders and removing the grill from the second story window.

One by one the victims were guided out from the window onto the ladder and brought down to safety where Brett and Chilli would check them over.

Gabby heard some rattling through the radio and muffled voices. She looked at Boden, a worried look on his face that reflected her own.

She continued looking at the window, praying for the safety of all the men inside, especially Matt's.

She spotted the boot of someone climbing out from the window but the turnout coat stated Borelli. The next boot that came out belong to someone of a smaller build.

Her hands were getting cold as she waited for the next figure to be out. But the moment Hermann came out from the window, a fireball flashed out behind him.

"Casey! Casey!" Boden's voice bellowed out from the radio.

It was not a moment too soon before they saw a body flung himself out the window and landed on the ladder held steady by Severide, Cruz and Capp. He slid down the ladder onto the ground.

"I'm fine." Matt said as his men helped him up. He took his helmet which had dropped in the process of his stunt from Hermann and his eyes frantically searched the audience looking for a familiar set of dark eyes.

* * *

"That was a close call."

Matt spotted Gabby seating on the bench in the locker room as he stepped out from the shower stall.

"Yea, it was. The curtain got caught in the heater system and caused a little bit of an explosion."

Matt saw as she averted her gaze to his chest which she knew was going to be bruised from the impact of the ladder. She could see the red marks of the ladder steps on his chest and the bruises that had started to form at certain areas where the impact was greater.

"It's not as bad as it looks," Matt was quick to reassure her.

"I know. But it still hurts."

"A little," he finally admitted.

"Here, rub this arnica ointment on the bruised area. It'll help to reduce the swelling. Antonio and I swears by it whenever we got into a mishap especially Antonio during his boxing days."

"Thanks babe, I will. Although it would be more efficient if you could rub it for me."

He joked trying to lighten the otherwise tense atmosphere between them. It seems to work as a small chuckle came out from her lips and she punched him lightly on his arms.

"We can always reverse roles and I'll play the nurse."

After sharing a quick kiss and before things went beyond the level of professionalism at work, she made her way into the common room leaving Matt to tend to his own injuries.

* * *

The wedding the next morning before shift ends went smoothly. Although there was a brief Riddle episode the evening before, she chose to not let him get to her. In a way, she was glad that Boden agreed to hold the wedding at the firehouse for the couple who lost their home to the fire yesterday morning. It seems like a victory in some way over Riddle who is adamant to have Boden and the rest of the firefighters in House 51 bend their knees at his feet.

As the bride walked down the aisle with her hand placed over father's arms to Brett's angelic voice, Matt took one of her hands which was resting on her lap into his, giving it a squeeze. She turned to look at him and he held her gaze. The look of love that passed between them could not go unnoticed by anyone who was watching the couple. That in that moment, she knows that they might not yet be married in the legal sense, but in their heart, mind and soul, they are already married, bounded by their own vows to love each other, be there for each other and stand up for each other through the end of time for better or for worst.


	3. Chapter 3

_Dawsey gap-filler for episode 4x06_

* * *

"Where's Kelly?" Gabby asked as she walked into the kitchen to find only Matt at the stove cooking what looks like scrambled eggs.

On normal mornings regardless if they have shift or not, she would walked into the kitchen to find the men in the house with a mug of coffee in each of their hands and eating whatever ready-made food that is within their reach. Like cereal and milk. Or bananas. That morning was not a normal morning.

"Why are you cooking?" she continued before Matt had a chance to answer her first question.

"Woah, did someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed?" Matt teased as he turned from the stove to look at her.

"No. No. Just not seeing Kelly greeting me with 'what's for breakfast' and you at the stove is just not normal."

Matt let out a chuckle, finding her reaction to a non-peculiar morning like that day some sort amusing and if he must say so himself, adorable. Although he didn't dare say that out loud.

"Kelly got called early by Patterson this morning. And I am a firefighter, Gabby. I can manage working a stove."

"I'm sure you can put out a fire with no problem Lieutenant Casey. But I can attest to you and the stove not being a good combination. And I rest my case," Gabby said as she pointed to the pan containing what used to be scrambled eggs.

In a split second, Matt spunned around and turned off the stove. He muttered a curse as he threw out the charred eggs into the bin. He could still hear Gabby laughing in the background. He turned around to give her a glare but with one look, could not help but laugh together with her.

"Alright, okay I admit firefighters are not born cooks. I was just trying to make you breakfast."

"That was a really nice thought, babe. But how about first you learn how to cook and you will be in-charge of breakfast from then on?"

"Yeah okay," Matt said sheepishly.

"Baby, did you even put any butter on the pan before you cracked the eggs in?" Gabby asked as she inspected the pan that Matt had threw into the sink.

"Err, yea I think I forgot about that?"

Gabby couldn't help but laugh at her helpless fiance.

* * *

"Hey Dawson, do you want your pancakes?"

"You can have my share Mouch. I've had my breakfast before I came in."

"That's weird, Casey told me I can have his share as well."

Gabby shook her head at Mouch's obvious observation and knowing him, she waited for him to continue.

"Hermann, did you have breakfast at home too?"

"I have 4 school going children, Mouch. I'll be lucky if I even have time to put on my shoes."

"So, Dawson and Casey, who are not yet married, ate breakfast together, which I'm going to presumed was prepared by Dawson because we all know how Casey fare in the kitchen. But you who is married don't even have time to dress yourself yet alone eat your breakfast."

"Spit it out Mouch."

"I'm just balancing the pros and cons here. Should I ask Trudy to marry me or should I ask her to move in with me?"

Gabby's eyes widen at Mouch's sudden announcement.

"You're proposing to Trudy?"

"She's been dropping me hints. But i don't know. Am I too old to get married? It seems a little ridiculous for us to be married if we don't intend to have kids and be a family. Or should I just ask her to move in with me? Dawson made breakfast for Casey. Maybe Trudy will make breakfast for me too. Her culinary skills may not be on par with Dawson but it is still better than our candidate's."

"Mouch, Casey and I are engaged. But anyway, you should ask Trudy to marry you. She is one of the most amazing woman I've met. Think of it this way, do you want to continue going around introducing her as your girlfriend or your wife?"

Mouch raised a finger at her and nodded. "You're right. I need to think long term."

"Gabby, you're amazing."

Mouch was about to lean forward to give Gabby a kiss when he heard someone clearing his throat behind him. He turned around and spotted Casey standing in the entrance of the room with an eyebrow raised. Mouch felt like a kid who had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He turned a shade redder as Hermann and Otis couldn't help but burst out laughing at the scene before them.

"Sorry lieutenant, just joking around."

"You better be. Anyone seen Severide?"

"Outside, cleaning the rig. Patterson's orders."

Matt frowned at the reply. Severide cleaning the rig? Wow, he couldn't remember the last time he saw his bestfriend did that since their candidate days. He couldn't say that he agrees with Patterson's leadership methods. It is one thing to take away Severide's pupils citing bullshit excuse such as lack of management skills but Severide's skills as a firefighter has never been questioned. To treat him like a candidate, that is just plain insulting.

Before he left to continue his search for Severide, his gaze caught the glistening pair of dark eyes seated in the seat beside Mouch. She raised her eyebrows at him, teasing him about the scene that he had just witnessed seconds ago. Resisting the pull she has over him, he reflected her teasing smile with one of his own, before spinning on his heels to head into the driveway.

* * *

They were on the way back to the station from a call and all Matt could think of was the baby that he caught after being thrown from the roof of the house by the mother.

"Casey, we need gas."

His thoughts were interrupted by Otis's voice. "Yea, yea ok."

The guys in the truck did not think any differently about the change in their lieutenant's demeanour. Everyone that was except Gabby. They assumed that his sudden retrieval from the rest of the team was because he was bothered by Severide's relationship with Patterson. All of them saw how Severide was treated in the past few calls. It would seem that Severide and Borelli were of the same rank if not for the stark difference in Severide's firefighting ability. All of them agreed that even Patterson's firefighting skills paled compared to Severide's.

She stared at the back of Matt's head as they made a detour to get petrol. Something had triggered in him that was causing him to battle an inner turmoil. She knew him well enough to know that the cause of his distraction was personal and has got nothing to do with Severide, Patterson or the politics in CFD.

As the gas was being pumped, Gabby jumped down from the truck and joined Matt by the side of the truck. She touched his forearm lightly feeling the tension in his body as he stared ahead at a group of children who had just left the convenience store with ice cream in their hands.

"Hey, you ok?"

"What? Yea, yea, I'm fine. What's wrong?"

"Nothing. You seemed so distant. Nice save with the baby back there."

"I just can't believe that a mother would actually throw her own newborn baby from a 2 storey house. What if I did not manage to catch the little guy?"

That was it. That was what at the top of his mind. Gabby had no words to reply. She did not really agree with the mother's actions back there but she could understand the mother's desperation to get the baby out of harm's way even if it meant laying it all on luck and the ability of an unknown firefighter. She rubbed his forearm in comfort, her eyes offering sympathy to what happened.

* * *

" _It's getting too hot! I need to get my baby off the roof!"_

" _Mam', stay where you are! We're coming for you."_

" _No! Catch my baby."_

" _Why didn't you catch my son? You killed my baby!"_

"Matt! Matt!"

Matt woke up with a start. He was covered in sweat and his heart was racing miles a minute.

"Gabby! Is the baby fine?"

"Baby, what baby are you talking about?"

"The baby. At the fire."

"He's fine babe. You caught him, remember."

Gabby took in the glassy eyed look on Matt's face. Her heart goes out to him. He had been her rock past few weeks since they lost their baby. He had been the pillar and her strength to move on as she healed physically and emotionally and gain back her strength. Never once had he falter or broke down in front her.

She rushed to his side as he sat up on his bunk bed. Cradling his head in her hands, she tenderly swept his messy bed hair back and gave him a tender kiss him at the top of his head.

"You would have caught the baby, no matter what you have to risk, babe."

His next words her startled her to the core.

"I killed our baby."

"I told Will that if it comes down to a choice, I told him to save you. I couldn't save our baby," he continued before she had time to regain her senses after his sudden revelation.

His sobs rang through the locked quarters.

A moment longer before finally recovering from the initial shock, Gabby pulled him into the crook of her neck. She continuously rub his back in slow circles to comfort him as well as herself. She could not control the tears that were rolling down her cheeks as well. Her heart was torn open yet again after being reminded of what they both loss and it also gave out to the father of her unborn child who had to make a choice that no fathers had to make.

Pulling him back a little, she brought his face close to hers and looked into his eyes as she spoke, "You did not kill our baby. The pregnancy was not meant to happen. Don't ever think you're selfish or or worst still, a bad dad. You're going to make an amazing father one day. The best a kid could ever ask for."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to break down on you like that."

"You and me, remember. No matter what."

"You and me. No matter what," he repeated as he brought their foreheads together. He felt slightly lighter after that. Unbeknown to him, all the blame he had placed on himself and the responsibility of making the call if it ever comes down to it finally caught up with him. He squeezed Gabby a little tighter to him. He needs to take in some strength from her to move on from here.

They cuddled up in the office for a little while more, both having the need to take in comfort from the other. If they had been _the_ couple before this, they were most definitely _THE_ couple right now.

* * *

"Has anyone seen Dawson? I want to run by some ideas with her on Molly's," Brett asked the guys at the table as she walked in from a call.

"I think Dawson's with Casey. I don't think you want to disturb them right now. Casey had it pretty rough with the baby at the last call," Hermann replied. Gabby and himself had shared a look on the way back to the station from the petrol station. Both of them worried about their lieutenant after Hermann caught him calling Brett and asking her how the baby he saved was doing.

"What's with the look Brett?"

"You know, I've not seen any couple who are as fitting as Dawson and Casey. They seemed to just get stronger as a couple than ever since they got back together."

"Tragedy bring people closer together, more so when it happened to a couple. But it can also drive people apart. I'm glad they fall under the former."

"I always know they're meant for each other. Anyway, can you let Dawson know i'm looking for her when she comes back?"

* * *

"Are you going to stay up for me, sweetie? I will show you a surprise," Matt snuggled his face on the back of Gabby's neck breathing in the smell of lemon of her recently purchased shower foam and hugged her from behind.

"If you play your cards right, maybe." Gabby replied with a hint of a tease in her voice as she continued to stir the pasta sauce she was cooking for dinner.

"Should I show you a bit of review?" Matt started to suck and linger kisses along her back from the spot right behind her ear right down to her shoulders.

"Haha. Matt, stop it. I'm cooking now. Are you having dinner with me before the concert?"

"Yup, i am. I'll get the drinks."

* * *

The concert didn't turn out to be what they expected. Not bothering to stay behind with Mouch and watching the concert from the back of the stage, Hermann, Otis and himself found themselves hanging out with the rest of the guys at Molly's.

"Alright, guys. I'm out."

"Lieutenant, but you only had 1 beer," Otis said curiously.

"I got somewhere to be."

Hermann smiled to himself having overheard the conversation between Otis and Casey. The fatherly figure in him couldn't help but feel happy for his grown daughter to have a man like Casey.

* * *

As Matt stepped out from his truck, he thought he saw the same car that was parked at Molly's turning in into his block and parked a few cars behind him. He could not see who the driver was but it was dark and he already had a few beers in. He didn't think much about it, he might be mistaken and it could be two different cars or coincidentally, a regular patron at Molly's lives in the same block as him.

Having decided not to dwell too much into it, he took out his keys and make his way into the apartment.

"Gabby?"

Matt walked into the apartment to find it dark except a small flicker of light coming from his and Gabby's bedroom. His excitement build up as he dropped his keys on the countertop, took off his jacket and followed the light.

"Baby?"

"I'm ready for that surprise." the deep and husky voice whispered in his ear.

He turned to find Gabby clad in a black lingerie that he had always loved. His eyes sparked with lust and love.

It's safe to say that they enjoyed the night immensely and Kelly could probably attest to it as he walked into the apartment that they shared a few hours later.


	4. Chapter 4

Dawsey gap-fillers for episode 4x07

* * *

"Who's that, baby?"

Matt stared at his screen as he tried to figure out who it was on the other line. The mystery caller had all but dropped the call after a few moments of silence.

"I don't know, babe. It's a blocked number and the line was dead by the time I answered."

"Maybe the person will call you back if it's important."

"Yeah, maybe," Matt replied with an etch of cynicism in his voice. He just had this tingling feeling that something did not feel right. Maybe it was just some kid who's prank calling. It would not be something to worry about. But just to be safe, he thought that he would reach out to Antonio if he receives a call from the mystery caller again.

"So, anyway as I was saying, I think Riddle is behind this criminal conspiracy to sideline Boden. I mean, who else stand to gain from this situation?" Gabby continued, oblivious to Matt's turmoil over the mystery caller.

"I will not be so quick to conclude, babe. There's no evidence to prove that the Chief is behind this. Plus, wouldn't it be too extreme for him to go all the way to place Boden behind bars?"

Gabby paused mid-way in gathering the breakfast dishes as she turned around to give him an incredulous look with a raised eyebrow.

Having seen the glare Gabby was throwing at him, Matt raised his hands in a surrender motion. "OK. OK. Look, all I'm saying is I'm behind Boden a 100 percent. But I can't agree with you wholeheartedly that it could be Chief Riddle behind this. It could be him or it could be someone else. We don't know. Anyway, have fun on your outing with Eva. I'll text you later if I can join you guys for lunch ok. Love you. Mwah!" Matt bent his head to kiss her goodbye before grabbing his keys and phone from the dining table to attend to a construction gig.

Gabby on the other hand had planned to spend their off day with Eva for a day of shopping and lunch afterwards. Since her brother's divorce, Laura had shifted and brought her kids to live at a couple of streets away from her previous matrimonial home. That meant her commute to see her niece and nephew had extended from fifteen to forty-five minutes. It sucks not being able to see them as often as she used to but as the kids are getting older, they themselves have been busy with school and socialising with their friends that she is just grateful for whatever time she could get to spend with them.

* * *

"Hey, how was shopping? Did you manage to find a dress for the gala?" Matt asked as he saw Gabby coming into the house from his seat at the dining table, drawings from his sketch on the wooden shed he is building for a client spread before him.

"Yup, I did. Got a prom dress for Eva too. Can't believe she's going off to college in a few months. Time really flies," Gabby replied as she bent down to give a Matt a quick peck on the lips before heading to the direction of their bedroom to put her shopping away.

Matt stood up from the table and followed her into the bedroom but before he could take a peek at the dress Gabby had bought, she managed to keep it hidden in the wardrobe away from his prying eyes. "I texted Severide, said he'll join us for dinner. He's on his way back now. So, cooking or ordering in?"

"I'm beat. Shall we order in?"

"Your call babe. You know how partial Severide and I are about cooking. Mexican or Italian?"

Gabby turned around from the dresser she was leaning against as she removed her jewellery to face Matt and gave him the cutest look she could pull as she said, "I have a craving for Chinese. Is that ok?"

A slow smile creep on Matt's face as he felt drawn to kiss the pout on her lips. Closing the short distance between them in a few strides, he placed his hands on the dressing table on either side of her, trapping her body between his and the dresser. "Maybe I can be persuaded," as he bent down to whisper huskily into her right ear. He felt her let out a gasp as his tongue started swirling in her earlobe and his hands grabbed her waist to pull her closer.

A slammed door jerked them apart as they belatedly realised that their roommate is back and the door to their bedroom is wide open. Looking at each other, they let out a small laugh at the idea of Severide catching them together making out like some teenagers.

"I'll order some Chinese while you hit the showers. We will continue this later," Matt promised as he pushed Gabby towards the bathroom.

* * *

"Hey man, how's fishing?"

Severide looked up from the beer he was drinking by the fridge as he saw Matt approaching him. "Good. Fish's biting. Anyway, there's this black Camry parked outside our house. New neighbour?"

Matt shook his head as he pieced out that the car he thought was following him the other night could probably be only his new neighbour. "I don't know. Probably, ya. Think I saw the car pulling out from Molly's the other night. Didn't see the driver though. Anyway, I'm ordering Chinese. Anything special you want to order?"

"Nah, the usual for me. I'm going to wash the sea grime off me. I'll see you later," Severide replied as he dropped the empty beer bottle in the recycling bin and made his way to his bedroom.

Matt stared at his friend's retreating back and let out a sigh. He hoped the fishing trip he took had manage to calm him down after the incident that happened last night. He didn't think that Patterson's decision to suspend Severide is warranted. The alleged threat made by Severide took place in a bar scene for God's sake. Matt himself knew how to lay his pupils at the door whenever he went out with his men and just have a good time with them. They could be a bunch of knuckleheads sometimes but they are no doubt one of the most loyal and trustworthy men he has had an opportunity to get to know and lucky enough to be working with. Letting out a sigh, he took out his phone from his jeans pocket to place the Chinese order for dinner.

* * *

Gabby was stopped dead in her tracks as she stepped into the locker room, her gaze fixed on the huge blue and black bruise that spread from Matt's right lower back down to his hips, the rest of the bruise covered by the towel wrapped around his waist. She must have let out a gasp as she saw Matt's body stiffen and he stood a little taller. "Matt! What happened?"

Matt cursed himself inwardly for forgetting to get changed in the shower stall after taking a shower. Without having to turn around, he knew without a doubt that his girlfriend had notice the bruise on his lower back and is angry that he didn't mention anything about it to her. He didn't feel anything after getting knocked down by an ignorant driver earlier at the call. He could barely even feel any pain right now except for a dull throb by his lower right back. It wasn't until fifteen minutes ago that he actually noticed the huge bruise that had begun to spread from his lower back down to his back upper thigh when he had stripped to get into the shower.

He pivoted slowly as he took in the horrified expression on his girlfriend's face. "Babe, it's really nothing. I got hit by a car at the call this morning. I felt fine and I still feel fine right now." The words tumbled out from his mouth as Matt tried to soften the blow he was convinced he would received from her.

Gabby could not hold back the sigh of relief she exhaled and started probing on Matt's injury to make sure for herself that nothing is amiss. She trusts Matt but when it comes to his well-being, Gabby had learned to be more assertive and make sure that he is telling the whole truth and not hide his actual feelings behind his high tolerance of pain. "Don't hide these things from me again Matt. From what I can feel, nothing is broken. Just a bit of swelling which needs to be iced down."

Noticing the still worried look in her eyes, Matt grabbed her hand from his waist and held in between his own. "I'm fine babe. I'll iced it when I get home ok."

"Good. i'm going to head to Brett's right now. I'll see you later tonight at Molly's?"

"Yup, I'll see you. I love you."

"I love you too."

* * *

"Hey morning."

"Morning. Gabby didn't spend the night?"

"Nope. Cereal's over there," Matt replied, pointing to the cereal box on the breakfast counter.

"So, what's this I heard about the theory Gabby cooked up on Boden's situation?"

"She has this theory that Riddle and Patterson set this whole thing with Boden's neighbour to sideline him so that Riddle can pave his way up to the top without anymore obstacles. Not all truths I tell you."

Severide gave out a little laugh. It might not be far from the truth, he thought.

* * *

"I'll swing by Brett's at 7."

"I can't believe Riddle actually told Chief not to attend the gala tonight. I mean c'mon, these assault charges, they're bullshit. Everyone knows what kind of man the Chief is. He would never assault anyone let alone a woman."

"I know. The truth will come out. You'll see."

"I hope so. I'm going to check in with Antonia again later. See if there's anything else we can do to help."

"You do that. Anyway, you're coming back to our place after the gala tonight right?"

"Yeah, I think so. But I am anticipating to hear the story of Brett's date with Otis tonight."

"Otis, really? What happened to the bro code?"

"Seems like Otis didn't take the oath."

"Oh before I forget, Connie asked me to pass this to you. It was sent to the firehouse," Gabby continued as she handed to Matt a brown manila envelope with Matt's name on it. "What is it?"

"Let's see," Matt replied as he unsealed the envelope. It was a couple of photographs of him and Gabby taken over the course of a few days as they went about their daily routine to work, to Molly's and there was even one of the two of them outside the firehouse. "It's a bunch of photographs. Of us."

Matt handed the photographs over to Gabby who looked at him with terrified eyes. "Matt, who sent these photos?" Gabby noticed that there was no returned address or any clues on the envelope on whom sent those photos. She felt a dread of panic as she looked up at Matt to see if he knows of who might have sent those to him.

However, Matt was anxiously looking around the restaurant to spot anyone who might have have been watching them but could not find anything amiss. The breakfast place they were at were practically empty except for a few older men sitting with coffee in one hand and the newspaper in the other. He can feel anger starting to rise in him at who would dare sent such things to him, to the firehouse no less and what is the meaning of sending those photos to him?

Grabbing Gabby's wrist, he threw some bills on the table to cover their breakfast and headed out towards his truck. "I'm taking you back to our place. We'll head out to Brett's later for you to get ready for the gala. Call Antonio now and see if he can meet us back home."

"Matt, what's going on?"

"I don't know Gabby, I don't know. Let's get out of here and we'll figure it out ok."


End file.
